off topic but...

okay, this is totally off topic, but....

i hate texas!! im sorry to all those that live here and love it, but hey u cant please everybody all of the time.  texas makes things harder than what they truly need to be! everything has a million different ways to do things, besides the quicker more efficient way. the people here are as backwards as they come (okay, most people), most people here havent been outside of texas and i truly believe they dont know that other places exist besides texas! i hate the roads and how retardedly complex they r in order to get to point b from point a. i hate the way the streets are counted because there are at least 5 other houses right next to mine with the same house number. this is a small division, u mean to tell me that u came up on my house number (which is quite high) 4 other times on these tiny streets??!! i hate that black people still get stared at here as if we just landed on earth (which to many people here earth=texas). im from va and I thought they were bad....until i moved here!!! i thought va was backwards...until i moved here!! texas has truly shown me that i really didnt kno the meaning of these words until...i moved here. okay im dun, at least for right now.

i cant wait to move, two years left, im counting down...Lord, please help me make it back to the east safe and sound!

p.s.-wuts the deal wit texas toast?? its a big a** piece of dry bread! nothin special, why did u name it after ur state? maybe cuz the state is big and dry...yeah, that's it! 

*on a side note* it does have great shoppin!

So everything is everything right now. I totally missed my doc appointment to get the last bit of blood drawn and i feel bad, but not bad enough to head out to let them steal blood from my arm again. i have tons of pain in the crease of my arms from when they TRIED to take blood at least six times either at the office or at the hospital!! even when i go to the trained phlebotomist, they still have to try at least 3 times. "oh u have small veins", "r u being difficult today?"-these are the phrases i can do without for the rest of my life. I will probably go at some time, but im sure my levels are zero, they were 14 the last time they checked. since that time ive had a period and dont have any of the other preggo symptoms that I was having. the last to go were the sore boobs! LOL!! 

Now i just need prayer and encouragement, though i have faith, additional support from my family and friends is always helpful. According to the doc I have a peak 6 months to try to conceive, which i will try my best to do!! : D     At least i can ride my bike again and i guess i will get on tomorrow but not for a long time because the engine gets hot and im not 100% yet. SOOOO, here's hopin for sore boobies and morning sickness!

Tic...Toc...Tic...Toc

why no post? well im just waiting...still on bedrest, but of course ive been out and about. I havent been over doing it, but im not just sitting around! 

There are so many things going through my head around these next few months, but this "time off" gives me the chance to get a plan of attack for my ttc mind! I dont want to be totally consumed or feel like im using my husband. I just want it to be like before all "this" went down, where things were just fun and we are just enjoying each other's company. though i was informed by my RE and my surgeon that the first 6 months were the optimal time, i dont want to think about having a timeline. Ive already gone craaazzzyy and said "well since i only have one tube technically i only have three months to get pregnant". see how i did that?? see how i just freaked myself out and totally halved by chances and optimism by 50%!!! in a matter of seconds.  

Well Im optimistic about everything (from getting pregnant, to spending time, to me NOT losing my mind!!). 

Well Im still waiting, and i must say that i thought my surgeon said that i would not have AF on these pills and Clearly I was wrong! I was shocked and appalled at the same time, but i guess two weeks ago when it looked like i was ovulating and i convinced myself that i was trippin' was truly an ovulation week. my body is so mechanic, I know that's a good thing, because here i am only weeks after gone through something so traumatic and my body is actin like it never happened. okay, im done really...for real...im done...